2

Those People

007

(This took a while for some people to comprehend so we had to post our positive pregnancy test).

Since becoming pregnant with my second (hubby’s third), I’ve been hearing:

“Wow, you are going to have your hands full.”
“If I could, ‘I’ would not have ANY more kids.”
“You know, me, personally, I could not handle anymore little ones.”
“You and Steven are going to be run ragged. You won’t have time for anything.”
“You’re having ANOTHER one, really?!”
“You want HOW many?!”

And these are just some of the unwanted, senseless opinions I am being “graciously” tossed.

But, I . . . . . . . . . I am about ready to scream and let my pregnant self tell them what I think because these same things were stated when I was pregnant with my son. You’d think they learn to shut their mouths by now, seriously.

Normally, I like to keep the peace and keep quite but, sometimes, enough is enough and then. You. Crack!

Pregnancy tends to bring forth those who think they are experts or those who think you need to limit your family to a certain number and yadda, yadda, yadda. I’m sure you’ve all had your share.

So, I’ve decided I am going to start backfiring some overdue responses to “those people.”

1.) Well, I have all of these eggs and I see no sense in wasting them so…
2.) Well, we are trying for our own TV show.
3.) Yes, I am having another. That’s usually what happens when you’re married.
4.) Yeah, you’re right. I will have my hands full. I guess we’ll have to sell one of the kids. Hmm,do you think the circus would take one of them?
5.) It’s a tradition in my family to have loads of kids.

Honestly, since when did having three get frowned upon in the U.S.?

It’s not like we are going to be driving around in a clown car, stop, and a plethora of children emerge from the back. It’s number 3! Number 3! For now, anyway.

So, mommies expecting another or planning to, remember:

We are the ones giving birth to these beautiful wonders, not them.
We will be the ones raising them, feeding them, nurturing them . . . breaking up the sibling spats, kissing bruised and scraped knees.
So, what’s it to “those people” anyway.

If you have something negative to say about a woman or family having another, here is some helpful advice:

“Keep it to yourself.” Because, truth be told, get ready for it . . .

WE DO NOT WANT TO HEAR IT!
WE DO NOT CARE WHAT YOU THINK OR HAVE TO SAY!

We’ve got enough things to worry about without you adding your input.
So, just smile, keep your unwanted opinions to yourself, and go about your business.
And you will not have to deal with a hormonal pregnant lady. 😉

0

All In a Day’s Night

004

My toddler. My energetic, joyous, loving, and extremely sweet toddler. I love him more than words can describe.

However…

This energetic, joyous, loving, and extremely sweet toddler can drive me utter bananas sometimes. Yes, I know it is all part of being a parent but still the chaos at times can, well, cause temporary insanity.

Yesterday evening, he had an “explosion.” Teeth are coming in so this is normal, I understand. But, my energetic, joyous, loving, and extremely sweet toddler decided he was going to dig his hands in the mess and then roll around on the bed.

I still kick myself for stating, “Oh, we’ll never need a changing table.” Yeah, right.

Anyhoot, I clean him, strip the soiled bedding, and prepare a bath for him. He acts like a crazed sea creature once I place him into the tub, sending water all over me and the floor with his manic splashing. He is out and I am preparing to place a diaper on him when he decides to aim and fire! All over me and all over the clean quilt on the bed. Sigh.

I want to cry but I suck it up like a big girl and begin putting fresh linen on the bed while my energetic, joyous, loving, and extremely sweet toddler gets to everything in my room: pulling clothes off hangers, stuff out of drawers, and items off of shelves.

He is still learning so I grant a few stern, “Noes” and place him outside of our room.

Chores are done, bed is made, and I am getting ready to sit down to relax with a cool glass of root beer. My husband and I begin talking about the other plans we have for the yard when my energetic, joyous, loving, and extremely sweet toddler waltzes over and drops the DVD remote control into my cool glass of root beer. Yep! Needless to say, I was not happy.

To add to this, he fought sleep until 9:30 pm and then was up past midnight because he had trouble falling back to sleep (which rarely happens) and wanted to “play.” Mommy doesn’t think so, bud.

It’s 2:45 pm and I still feel like Zombie Mommy or a Mombie.

Oh, and I am out of caffeine and chocolate.

0

A Cheaper Way to Protect Those Precious Heads in the Tub!

I am proud of myself. I found an innovative and inexpensive way to stop my son from hurting or hitting his head on the tub’s faucet. We searched several stores and not one had something. Then, on the way out of Walmart, I spotted arm floaties. Being they were 97 cents, I thought I would try them. I put air into one and placed it around the faucet. It worked! It stayed on through Jonah’s bath and withheld him sliding and bumping into it, because even though I try holding that boy while bathing, I do need to free my hands to get soap and shampoo for him).

196

0

A Busy Spring and Summer Are in Store for Us This Year

Every year we plant flowers, herbs, veggies, and fruit in our garden. It’s an exciting time for us because it is an inexpensive way our family can spend time together, plus our children are able to join in on the fun! Canning is also enjoyable to do with our older child. And reaping the rewards from the garden is an added bonus!

Besides the garden, we decided to take a few mini vacations with the kiddos. Our son will be needing hand surgery (on both hands) as well so any activities involving getting soaked are out of the question. But, there are plenty of other activities we can do that do not involve water, such as:

1) The Zoo!
My kids adore animals, especially my son, so a zoo is an excellent idea for a family outing.

2) The hands-on museum!
If your kids are like mine, they have a goal in life to touch EVERYTHING they see. And a hands-on museum is just the ticket for curious little minds, plus it is educational.

3) A hike! We enjoy going to a place called: Bays Mountain Park and Planetarium.
They have a plethora of activities to do for all ages such as: Wildlife preservation areas (including wolves, birds, and reptiles to name a few), a planetarium, a ferry ride, 25 miles of hiking trails, picnic areas, fishing spots, breathtaking views, a 3,000 acre outdoor classroom, a small museum, and an adventure course (hubby want to try this–oh dear). And the costs for the activities (minus the adventure course) are less than three dollars! Great deal, huh?

We also want to add more things to our children’s play area.

1) A chalkboard table
2) A climb-on turtle (made from a large planting pot or half barrel, tires, and a wooden head.
3) Hubby has the idea of an AstroTurf lawn–something we can spray down with a hose and where the kiddos are less like to get hurt.
4) A sandbox (a turtle sandbox was given to my son by his uncle so this part is taken care of).
5) A small tepee they can use as a clubhouse/fort.

I will also be painting the rooms to liven and brighten up the home.

Yes, we have a full plate but we get to look forward to some enjoyable experiences all the while making memories. We are nervous as any parent would be about our son’s surgery, but we will get through it.

God bless you all, and may you all enjoy the Spring and Summer seasons this year.

0

The Joys of Shopping With a Toddler

I am one of those salmonella and germ phobic mothers. You know the ones that grab at least three or more sanitary wipes and scrubs down the cart before placing our child inside? Yeah, that is me. If we do not have the seat cover with us, I guarantee you that cart will be scrubbed down as though I am trying to pass a sanitation inspection! I get many looks from people. But, that is alright because I can shop assure knowing my child’s rearend and hands (because they always end up in his mouth) will be touching a clean surface. But, anyways, back to the joy of shopping…

We go through the aisles, he is hanging out the side like a monkey in a tree. Why? Because, in my family we do not give birth to children; we birth wild animals. And ones that have more energy than ten children combined. You also want to avoid clothing aisles because those little monkeys will drag hangers and all with you as you pass by, leaving a trail of clothes behind you, to which you must turn around and place back on the racks, meanwhile trying to hold them back and push their hands away from grasping the objects again. And also hoping they have not tossed anything out of the cart that you have placed in…because they. will. do. that. Why? Because their soul purpose at this stage in life is to give you heart attacks and drive you crazy.
You will learn to put all items that they know are theirs at the bottom of the cart and anything light enough for them to pull to the front with them or toss on the floor. And you will ponder to yourself things like: “I wonder why someone has not invented a shopping cart with a plexi glass window on the back of a child’s seat for occurrences such as these?” Or “Dear lord, what is that smell? I hope it is gas because I really do not want to leave my entire cart full of groceries in front of the bathroom. I am nearly done.” But, that is part of the Murphy’s Law for Children. They never have to go potty before they leave or enter a store. It is always in the middle of shopping, right before checkout, right when you are LEAVING the store, or when you are on the road and there is nowhere to stop.

You will also learn to pack an extra outfit because surprise messes only occur when you do not have a back-up outfit because you forgot to put another one in from the last “accident.” It’s the only time explosions ever occur.

So, now you are at the checkout and your toddler decides those coupons in your hand look like a fun thing to play with. And so begins the tug-of-war with his little hands…and those little fingers which can be compared to vice grips because you just about need the Jaws of Life to pry anything from them.
You pick up the ripped coupons from the floor and hand them to the cashier, explaining why they were ripped and apologizing for it, for reasons still unknown to you. You began “trying” to place your bagged items in the cart whilst trying to dodge small grasping hands. You pay for your purchases while trying to hold down a wiggling tot with the other because they are flexible little wonders and can stretch and wiggle out of seat belts even when strapped in firmly. Yep, try to explain that one.

And on the way home, you rattle your brain because, somehow, shopping is more tiresome than cleaning. And then your thoughts wander to what you are going to fix for dinner the entire week and what chores await you tomorrow…until you snap back into reality as your husband is asking you to please exchange toys from said toddler because he is shining his toy flashlight (with many different settings for colors) on the windshield, in front of his father while he is driving (of course because why shine it anyplace else? What fun would that be? Right?) So, you do your best yoga stretch to retrieve the toy. But, kids can read minds so the toy goes to the other hand, pulling it away from your reach, only for the light to begin bouncing across the windshield. Now, you packed it because he enjoys playing with it. Did you mean to come home at Sunset? No. But, when shopping with children you need to multiply your trip by like three or even five because it ALWAYS takes longer with children. Always.

0

I’m Going to Lose My Mind!

I am lying in bed last night. Instead of going to sleep like a normal human being, I am thinking of all the things I need to do tomorrow and of the things I did not get done. I should be getting some shut eye because it won’t be long and my nearly fourteen month old, who still is not sleeping through the night like other people’s normal children do (yeah, they like to rub it in) will be WIDE AWAKE and will fall magically asleep once he lays bewteen Mommy and Daddy and proceeds to kick one of us. So, who was the lucky victim tonight? Luckily, it was my husband.

It’s morning. Sleeping-in was thrown out the window many years ago so we rise at the break of dawn, or before that depending upon when the little monkeys decide to wake Mommy. Because, you know, Mommy’s don’t need sleep. EVER.

Kids are fed, I have my coffee–which I desperately try to drink while it is still hot, which hardly ever happens because someone always needs me or is into something they are not supposed to be into.

I contemplate cloning myself. I need like three of me.

My son has an “explosion” and when changing him, he decides to grab a handful of the mess and proceeds to smear it all over the clean quilt I just laid on the bed not two days ago. Of course, why not? He’s a mess. I’m a mess. The bed’s a mess…my home is a mess.

And you know what?

I. DON’T. CARE.

At least today I don’t. Sometimes, I just need to let things go and take a moment to breathe. Why? Because I cannot control everything and I need to realize that my home is not going be like Martha Stewart’s (darn you and your perfectness, Martha, putting all mother’s to shame)!

I wish it was though…

Fastforward. My step-daughter says, “I made my bed and cleaned my room. Come look!” I walk back to her room. Her bed is made. Her room is clean(ish) and her entire room has been rearranged! Yep. Why not? Because our life is like the Domino Effect. We battle for about thirty seconds because one of her new things to say is, “I will,” and “almost”until she finally gets up and does as she told, proceeded by a “Why?” All this why she lounges on her bed.

I have no clue where children conjure up these irritating responses. I wonder if they gather on the playground and have a “think tank” and brainstorm ideas to annoy their parents.

“Why? Because I said so, that’s why.” And, almost? Almost means something is part way done. Saying it before you do something doesn’t make sense. Kids. -_-

And, my sweet son has hit the “exploring” stage. He explores the DVD shelf, the book shelves, picture frames, knick knacks, laundry, toilet paper, his sister’s stuff, our stuff, the toilet, you name it, he “explores” it. So this Momma is on her toes, constantly. And, he has a super short attention span so he is bored with any toy I place in front of him 5-10 minutes later (if I’m lucky). And, it’s illegal an inhumane to cage children, so…

It’s afternoon and it dawns on me: I never got what I wanted out for dinner. Drat! It’s going to be a hotdog and can of chili night tonight, and I don’t even feel like cooking that. And when Hubby calls and asks me what’s for dinner or how has my day been, it takes everything in me to not want to scream.

Needless to say, I have had it.

I love my kids. I love my husband. I love my family. But sometimes, I need a moments peace, too. I wonder how Carol Brady did it or June Cleaver?

And I cannot even imagine what Mrs. Duggard goes through. How does she keep from going insane? Or maybe she already has and just doesn’t show it?

3

I Choose to Laugh

My son is nearly 14 months old, so he is at the “get into EVERYTHING and exploring” stage. Sigh. At least I get plenty of exercise because he sure keeps this Momma on her toes. I was able to get in some cleaning because he is also at the clingy stage and panics when he cannot see me. I stick him in his walker while I shower and just allow him to go down the hallway and the bathroom for my mind’s sake.

Well, he curiosity got the better of him this time.

Victim: The toilet paper.

015

A brand new roll at that.

It took less than 15 seconds for my wild monkey to unravel the TP and begun mummifying himself. My kid has talent!

I could not help but find the whole situation humorous. So, I snapped a photo. Plus, he looked so darn cute all bound up in Charmin.

Moments like these make me sit and ponder. I want to make the right choices as a mother. I want to choose to laugh at situations instead of getting upset over them. He is just a toddler, after all.

016